Women really are from Venus!

I am not a conspiracist – however, ever since the Di Vinci Code I have been looking for secret messages, symbols and meanings in Italian works of art. And after years of research and searching, at long last I think I have discovered one.

This amazing discovery could be worth writing a book about. John Gay certainly did. His book ‘Women are from Venus and Men are from Mars;‘ can now be proven for real, but not for the reasons portrayed in his book.

Lets study this amazing masterpiece from Botticelli (my favorite Renaissance Painter)

The above painting depicts Roman Gods Mars and Venus. It is an allegory of beauty and valour. The good looking, youthful, voluptuous lovers relax in a forest, the painting portraying sensuous love, pleasure and play.

But look closer!

Notice Mars; apart from a loin cloth he is naked. Look at him, the poor bugger, he’s passing on! It’s too hot! He has his head thrown back in typical response to high temperatures. ‘Gods,’ he is thinking to himself – ‘get this horrible lanky hair off my face!’ Even the playful Satyr closest to him is trying to cool him down by blowing fresh air onto his face.

Now look at Venus and her full length, two layered gown. Not an ounce of discomfort appears on her face. I also suspect that the middle naughty Satyr is surreptitiously and cheekily checking out her chest to see whether this is showing any signs of chill.

Now lets check out the solar system.

The order of the planets from closest to the Sun outwards is; Mercury, Venus, Earth, Mars, Jupiter, Saturn, Uranus and finally Neptune.

No wonder men suffer in the heat and women suffer in the cold!

We really are from different planets!

Just today at work the girls were complaining how cold they were. One had hands which felt like blocks of ice. She had to warm herself with a hot water bottle. Another had a heater under her desk! And another was wearing a cardigan.

The men, well all three of us were very comfortable, thank you very much – even a little bit hot. The trouble is, in the office we can never find the right temperature setting for the air conditioning;  we can never get the right medium which will keep both genders at an appropriate comfort level.

Whats the solution?

Personally, I think the women should be allowed to set the office temperature.

And I believe that the men  should be allowed to wear loin cloths to work as per Mars in the above painting. Within an instant arguments over the thermostat setting will evaporate. In fact, I am sure if I walked into work dressed in a loin cloth the women will be scrambling all over each other to turn the temperature down within an nano-second.

This post has been inspired by the guys and girls at work and the constant fighting over the thermostat control and temperature setting for the air conditioning.

Disclaimer:

Please note not all you read is real, not all you read is true. While I enjoyed Dan Brown’s ‘Di Vinci Code’ I did not buy into all the hype about it. I did not buy into secret messages being hidden within art. Could Mary Magdalene have carried Christ’s bloodline? While this is a nice thought – I am not so sure. Clearly Mary moving from the Holy Lands to the wilds of Scotland is implausible – because its far too bloody cold! 

Kia Ora Roly

 

 

2 thoughts on “Women really are from Venus!

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